They often call golf a “Gentlemen’s game”. Well, this time, the gentlemen and all the gentlewomen leading the organization got it right. The organization released a video on Monday, February 22, of one of its tour players, Madelene Sagstrom, sharing her story of surviving childhood sexual abuse.

For four years, we witnessed the daily dysfunction in the White House. Kellyanne Conway, in many ways, became the self-appointed ringleader of the Trump-era chaos.  Sadly, while she maintained a laser focus on her role in the circus, it appears she abandoned the much more critical role as the leader of her family.  While ANY family is entitled to familial privacy (regardless of their position in the public eye), Conway seemed to be entirely unbothered by her daughter Claudia’s online cry for help.  In an equally juvenile manner, Conway allegedly posted a topless photo of her daughter in response.  Think about that. 

Let’s address the elephant in the room right off the bat. Paris Hilton is a controversial figure. Her rise to fame had more to do with her family’s inheritance than it did with anyone’s skill or talent. Perhaps she was born a decade too early because it is common to mistake shock value with value. But for this blog, let’s compartmentalize.

President Trump’s policies have made it abundantly clear, children from other countries whose families may be seeking refuge from unimaginable situations are not worthy of decency. Not worthy of a better life. Not worthy of being allowed the opportunity to dream, to learn, to grow, and to be loved. They are treated like an infestation that needs to be eliminated. And so, the government locks them up in a cage, waiting to figure out the best way to discard them.

Here we are again. A second go-around with what was likely considered the unthinkable just a year ago. But as health experts predicted, the 2nd wave of the pandemic has hit us with more fortitude and fury than the first. As a result, schools and sports are shutting down. While this move may be necessary from a public health crisis perspective, we shouldn’t be so quick to narrow our definition of public health crisis to a transmittable virus. The shutdown and isolation intended to flatten the curve, will inevitably cause a spike in child abuse and neglect. Marry that with the stress of the holiday season, a tumultuous economy and cold weather and the detrimental grip of the COVID crisis grows tighter.

I’m sick of saying it, you’re sick of saying it, we are all sick of hearing it: “These are unprecedented times”. Well, they are but frankly, all of us are exhausted. What happens when we are exhausted? We tend to let our guard down, take our masks off, and dismiss advice to distance ourselves from the people we care about, love, and frankly miss dearly.

Once again, the United States is dealing with the aftermath and violent unrest of a fatal police shooting. This one in our beloved city, in broad daylight, with dozens of witnesses. There are too many social, racial and socio-economic issues to address in one essay. Too many to address in one newscast, newspaper article, protest, political ad or town hall meeting.

Yesterday, the Pope made big news.  In a new documentary, he declared gay people are “Children of God” and therefore entitled to the same civil rights as “traditional couples”.  Great!  But what about the actual CHILDREN who have been ignored, paid off, dismissed, ostracized and denied basic human rights AND a right to justice because their abusers were servants of the Church?

The film “Cuties”, a self-described “coming of age film”, which according to the director, criticizes the hyper-sexualization of adolescent girls, is being widely criticized for promoting the exact culture it is claiming to demonize. Regardless of personal interpretations of the film, let’s use the current hurricane of media attention (and political opportunism) to jump-start a bigger and much more important conversation.

I hope this finds you and your loved ones healthy and safe as we navigate through these uncertain times. As you know, for more than a decade, I’ve dedicated my legal practice to family law. However, my true passion has always lied in my advocacy work, representing children of abuse and neglect. Many are even victims of our fragile and inefficient social system designed to protect them.

While feelings of enragement compelled me to write this particular blog, I simultaneously was overwhelmed with sadness at the realization sexual predators are able to torture and damage their victims for years—sometimes decades, all because of institutional enablement.  The Curtis Institute of Music is the latest example of how an organization’s reputation and endowment eclipsed the safety and well-being of its students.  

Ok, so most of us haven’t used air-travel in a while. But we all know the in-flight drill before take-off. The flight attendant goes over safety procedures in the case of an emergency. Now, the instinct of a parent or caregiver is to ensure the safety and well-being of their child before themselves, if the unthinkable were to happen. However, do you recall the instructions regarding the oxygen masks? Here’s the announcement verbatim: “Please pull the mask over your nose and mouth. If you are traveling with a child, please attend to yourself first, then the child.” Why? Because it is impossible to take proper care of someone else, if you, yourself are in distress.

Last week, the Montgomery County District Attorney’s Office announced the arrest of a former Germantown Academy teacher for engaging in a sexual relationship several years ago with his 17-year old student.  Shocking?  Maybe for an elite private school community that may erroneously believe abusers are boogie men off the street.